As a single parent, loneliness has to be coped with properly or it can lead to symptoms related to depression. It is faulty relationships, or in this instance, a lack of healthy relationships that lead to undesirable consequences.

However, when you take a closer look at the experience of loneliness, it indicates dependency upon someone to meet your need for enjoyment, fun, and self-fulfillment. While it is desirable to have healthy and caring relationships which indeed help our mental health, dependency upon someone else to meet our need for enjoyment, fun, and self-fulfillment may in fact be unhealthy.

In that loneliness is an emotional experience based upon your thinking and perception of the situation, it can be coped with by changing your perception of the situation and then acting upon the changed perception.

It is important to reflect upon the question of, do you really need someone else to find enjoyment in your life?  Think critically about activities that you find enjoyable whether it’s dancing, going to musical events, going to museums, or whatever and begin going to these events. You find that these events will meet your criteria for enjoyment and uplift your spirits.  Not only that, you may meet someone at these events who share your interest in fun and entertainment.

Next, do some critical thinking about areas in your life that you want to improve. It may be that you are shy speaking in front of groups. If so joining Toastmasters might be a good idea. You are obligated to make speeches and in turn have them critiqued. Everyone in the group is on the same level. It may be that you have always wanted to learn a new dance. Taking a dance class might be a good idea. Again, you are on the same level as everyone else and you are out with others and putting yourself in a position to make new friends.

In addition to this, pursuing a hobby that is fulfilling and fun, even when done alone, augments the fun and enjoyment you are experiencing with the outside pursuits. I have an acquaintance that enjoys trying out new recipes and inviting people over. I have another acquaintance that knits hats and scarfs and give them away as presents.

Again, the feeling of loneliness is an emotional state. And an emotional state cannot be addressed directly, it has to be addressed by clear thinking followed by action.  Action which results in a change in behavior with pleasant results will begin to lessen the feeling of loneliness.

Keep up to date with timely financial and personal growth tips and strategies. Visit and You can subscribe to the monthly Financial/Personal Growth newsletter at either site as well as read and download the free articles and e-books. Will Barnes is a financial and personal growth consultant based in Illinois. Mr Barnes has conducted hundreds of workshops on parenting and counseled parents for decades.

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